LAME

Note:Today post contains emotional elements.

After having some dispute with my self, I finally made up my mind to fetch yamyam at INTAN.Even though I was so irate at him but I just can't let my baby keep waiting in the rain and he was probably worn out from a long journey as of Sg.Petani.

I didn't talk to him on our way back. I dun even look at his face. I just dun feel like it. He was very very worried. Serve u right, Mr. He keep provocating me to talk and try to be sweet but to me I just feel..disgust..

Never in my life have people treated me like that. Even when I was chubby and hostile my ex still acknowledges me as his girlfriend whenever people ask. And now when I was totally brush up, he simply treat me like a piece of shit. I never dub him with bad names before (except for bodoh..heh..he called me that name too) because I really respect my boyfriend. But yesterday I dunno what had gotten into me. I started screaming and go calling him bad-bad names. Sorry, I know I went out of the line. I'm so sorry but I'm not guilty to say..u deserve it.And..Even though I promised my self not to get violent with my bf like I used to do with my ex..I broke that promise. I hope I didn't hurt u a lot but if it did..Padan Muke!

Think about it. When he was not around I tried to be as nice as I could be. I dun go out with other guy that I think would hurt his feeling except once (he already approved it). I was alone on my birthday. If I want to, I can called up my ex and both of us can spent an intimate time together. I can do that, yamyam was not around, nobody would find out..but did I do it?NOOOOO..I did not..

Anyway I forgave him last night since I missed him so much even though his excuses was so

LAME
LAME
LAME

"I was just trying to make her feel guilty"

THAT WAS LAME..but

I guess I just missed him and wanted to hug him.

I always find sleeping would make all my worries go away but today I feel worst. After getting up I feel like a total idiot. How can I easily gave in last night??I never allow people to mistreat me..not even my bf..
I swear he's going to taste his own medicine..soon..

P.S:Might not be writing for sometime after this..My final is coming up..