There was a time

He had longer hair but the cheeky smile is still there. Finally after few times calling off, had the chance to have a drink with him last night, even I had to miss my fav show, desperate housewives. I thought he was still the same boy I used to know but when he opened his mouth, he's not that boy anymore.


I told him that he's a Malay wannabe when he told me he couldn't woo any Chinese girls instead all the chicas he dated were all Malay. But then he said "I don't want to be Malay. I don't want to be lazy"


And I corrected him, not all Malay are lazy and I told him not all chicas go for fat wallet guy. He laughed but concurred saying not all guys will sleep with whores even if given chance.


I still remember the moment on every single morning during my primary, I would take out my exercise books for him to copy. Back then he was too 'busy' to do his homework because was too occupied with football practice, until one day something happened to his leg during a football practice. Still, he copied my homework, with or without football.


Today, he's no longer the boy I used to know. Not goofy, not cheeky but someone who is full of integrity. He told me about his life in UK, how he paid every single penny using his own sweat and how he missed his girlfriend so much.


The other day I was quiet upset with him over 30 minutes telephone conversation when he confessed he's not going to wed to his girlfriend and don't give a shit about what she will think because he doesn't feel like it, even though they were together for almost 5 years. He also affronted me by saying he doesn't give a fuck about religion.


"What are you? Christian or something?" I asked, while sitting in my grandma's rest house.
"Nah, I don't have any. I don't believe in any religion. I think human were born to suffer"


I am no religious but it upset me when he said that because I used to lookup to him. I used to be okay with people point of view regardless any matter but not then. Later that night when I think about what he said not caring enough about his girlfriend, it did made me cry. I loath guy who took woman for granted as if we don't mean anything. He was there for me when I cried after getting my heart broken. He comforted me even we were thousands miles away. He was in UK and I was in Malaysia. How could someone I value uttered such words?


Last night, it was different. He finally spilled the beans. Of what happened in UK and everything related to it. I am almost ashamed to say but I had to admit that he's more courteous and dogged compared to some Malay I know for some reason which I shall keep to myself.


We talked about so many things. Love, life, deception and hopes. He has faith with his girlfriend although the image is still blurry and he gave me faith when he asked


"Both of us feel our lives are full of shit. Tell me one thing, what differentiate between someone who have no religion and someone who have faith in God?"


Someone asked me this questions once, 9 years ago and yesterday I was asked the same question, both by the same race.


I told him, on happy moments I have my God to thank to and on sad moments I have my God to seek for solace. I always have Him no matter what I do.


I almost didn't believe I said that [!!!].


It's such a wonder to hear such question from a guy who seemed to be thinking how to get laid all the time and to hear such answer from a girl who only thinks about herself all the time.


He did make me think later that night. Like really hard.


It was only 3 hours get-together but he managed to leave some inexplicable feeling in me the moment he stepped out from the car.