Rindu

Rindu.


Dusk at my place is always beautiful. I love to peep from the window enjoying the colours of the cloud. Enjoying the smell of transition from day to hours of darkness. From my place I could see the blue dome clearly where the serenade of azan seemed so mesmerizing. An addiction since I was a toddler, when everything used to be very easy.


The feeling tainted when reaching adolescent years, had to be away from my peaceful sanctuary. That time, when dusk embarked the scenery changed. And the feeling was different. I don't remember feeling secured anymore, I guess I must left them at the place where my heart belongs.


Numerous visits to the library on certain lesson had made me a fan of one book which scripture and pictured wonderful places of the nation. So many remarkable places; sandy beaches, colourful places and heaps of eye catching photographs. Yet, one picture captured my heart.


The blue dome.


In the dark, the blue dome stood proudly within the stunning reddish clouds embrace. Even I was hundred miles apart, I swear I can smell the air. My heart ached, I never felt so lonely, so lost. That time, I would give anything just to get an inch nearer to that blue dome.


That was my first lesson in discovering the meaning of the word rindu. The feeling that struck like a lightning on the heart. The feeling that make you weak. The feeling that make you feel lost. Lonely. Cold.


As I grow older, rindu comes and goes. Sweeping like a wind. It's like one of subsistence filling.


Still throbbing, even so many experience endured.


But.. what hurt the most is when you don't know how to say it and you don't know..whether it's worth to feel that feeling.


Rindu, I wish you would just go away..