Brother dearie

Usually I will always see my brother's girlfriend ayu, linger around the house. They have been together since they were 18 and now my brother is going to be 23 this year. I love his girlfriend, she was pretty, sweet and easy to get along with.


Towards the end of last year, my brother got a job from an MNC company and he started to get busy. Workings late at night and sometimes during weekends were his routine. If he's not working, he'll be sleeping. The fact that he love to sleep a lot bothered me sometimes. He could sleep for the whole day during ramadhan and woke up when it's time to breakfasting. I noted sometimes he didn't even woke up from his slumber even though his girlfriend called him like hundred times.


Not too long after he got the job. He tendered his resignation, due to pressure, his excuse. Not only that, he changed. He rarely got out from the house and preferred to spend his time on his own. I am not saying that my bond with my brother is that dear but we are quite close, but during the past few months we hardly ever communicate. I don't know what had happened to him but he refused to find any job and he had chosen to isolate himself. Therefore my mom, keep blaming him for not finding a job..and bla..bla..bla..You knowlah my mom kan.


Earlier this week, I had a chance to watch tv with him for a while. Thus open a chance for me to talk to him. I noticed that I haven't see ayu for quite sometimes so I asked.


Me: Mana ayu, lama tak nampak?
Ayie: Entah.Adalah kot.
Me: Did you both break off?
Ayie: Haah
Me: Bila?
Ayie: Lama dah.Sejak awal tahun *reading the paper* I never knew he read newspaper. Funny.



I wanted to ask more but I chose not to. Afterward, I asked my mom whether she knew about it. She said no but she was saying if it's true it's must be my brother. Saying, it must be him who decided to call it off or perhaps find another woman. Being my mom, she went and asked my brother straight to his face and later went on telling me. Well, it's the other way around. She found somebody else. My brother in the other hand did try to wheedle her back but she kept running away and kept giving excuses not to see him anymore. I know that at times I feel like I could kill my brother but sincerely I love him every bits and pieces. He is the only sibling I ever had. The one and only. Hearing the news and connecting to what had happened to him for the past few months made me went up to my room and wept.


I am so sorry for not being with him when he was facing difficulties in his life. I felt guilty for all the blame he had to take without anyone asking how he felt. My mom still put some blame on him, perhaps his too laid-back attitude changed ayu's heart which I furtively agreed and it's her choice anyway. But what I'm concern about is how my brother dealt with the pressure. From my observation, he was quite devastated but sadly no one seemed to bother. It is heartrending when you're on the bottom but no one seemed to care. Which make me feel really awful. True that he's mature enough to face challenges but still, no matter how old you are, getting your heart broken and pressures from your surrounding simultaneously are pretty tough to cope with.


He is starting to act his old self again, now. His daft yet entertaining jokes were all over the house. Even the cats mew annoyingly because he had their tail pulled. Those things used to annoy me but not now. Not now .


Perhaps we always screech at each other, calling names and wanted either one of use to give up the ghost. Perhaps it never crossed his mind that his only sister really loves him that she included him in her every single prayer. Well, he doesn't have to know that. It's not that important.


What's more significant is that one day, God grant my prayer that he will be bless with a blissful and meaningful life.