My weekend is like the other weekend.Nothing special,just spending time with azam.He left for Ipoh last night and for all that i know,i missed him..i really did.He was damn nice to me and was so patience even when i showed him my bitch attitude.I try to make him hate me and he said something like..
he:Kau cuba buat aku benci kau kan?That's why u are doing this to me.
Well,he was damn right.I did and i didn't feel bad.Not because i hate him or did it intentionally. No it's because i think it's some kind of payback. He hurted me.A lot because he left me alone, making me wept every night for him. After he's gone i struggled to adapt to my new milieu. For all i know, I succeed my attempt and slowly disregard him. But when he came back i would feel awkward coz his present seem to make me uncomfortable. I'm not use to have him around anymore. I found that all his doing is so wrong to me now. Even when he speak pleasantly to me, it just won't move me. I just can't figure out why..maybe because i'm kind of enjoying myself when he's not here to take care of me or the most suitable words ...to control me. He allowed my mind not to think of him anymore and slowly i'm having a heart of stone.I wish i could just make things right ..i wish i just can stop and hurting people..i wish i have the courage to make my decision..
On sunday due to my unbearable toothache, i went to see the dentist. I hate to go there coz even beeing a hi tech sort of girl,i hate the dentist's gadget.Uh oh..when prompting to the door, my knees weaken.I saw the 'devil machine',the one with the power to drill or do whatever that can cause blood to flow to ur teeth and gums.He was nice and gentle of course..but the moment he put his hand on the machine and start to do i dunno what to my teeth i trembled and my hand had to gripped my jeans.@#$%##.Luckily,i had no major problem,just some minor issues that can be settled by gargling with some red kinda mouthwash and rubbing some weird colourless ointment to my gums.And yes..the antibiotic(I hate medicine).He told me to pay him a visit on the becoming Saturday..Erm..thanks but no thanks.I wonder how can some people live to be a dentist?
might be going for futsal tonight after missing the monday session for about 2 weeks.Can't wait to get sweaty..
+If some things are better left unsaid, then maybe they too are better left undone.+
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